天外飛來巴斯光年

潔西卡艾芭版


2008年2月29日《We Are the Ones》



擅長說唱的「黑眼豆豆」團長威爾（will.i.am）推出了第二支專業級助選廣告，煽情勸投美國民主黨總統候選人歐巴馬（Barrack Obama）一票；他登高一呼，包括「驚奇大肚婆」潔西卡艾芭（Jessica Alba），「莉絲威斯朋沒三小路用的前夫」萊恩菲利普（Ryan Phillippe），「紅磨坊小侏儒」喬治羅培茲（George Lopez），「飆風再起猛男」泰瑞斯（Tyrese），激似荷兒貝莉的「X戰警瞎女」凱莉華盛頓（Kerry Washington），最近好像很閒的梅西粿（Macy Grey）等群星響應。

在鄉民不斷重複激越吶喊「歐巴馬」、輕聲柔語「這是我的國家，你的國家，我們的國家」的念白中，帶球跑的艾芭率先感性訴求：「希望給我就快出生的孩子一個更乾淨的地球。」還說：「也希望全世界都對偉哉吾國有更高評價。」

影片名稱「We Are the Ones」（吾等最大）以及貫穿全片的哼唱「我們能改變世界」，來自於歐巴馬在2月5日「超級星期二」的講演說詞：「我們就是自己期待已久的真命天子，我們就是自己不斷追求的改變關鍵。」（We are the ones we've been waiting for, we are the change that we seek.）

謠傳「天命真B」碧昂絲（Beyonce Knowless）和「橘郡盜版羅素克洛」班麥克肯齊（Ben McKenzie）原定要參與這支廣告演出。

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史佳蕾約翰森版


2008年2月5日《Yes we Can》

演講稿變念歌

It was a creed written into the founding documents that declared the destiny of a nation.

Yes we can.

It was whispered by slaves and abolitionists as they blazed a trail toward freedom.

Yes we can.

It was sung by immigrants as they struck out from distant shores and pioneers who pushed westward against an unforgiving wilderness.

Yes we can.

It was the call of workers who organized; women who reached for the ballots; a President who chose the moon as our new frontier; and a King who took us to the mountaintop and pointed the way to the Promised Land.

Yes we can to justice and equality.

Yes we can to opportunity and prosperity.

Yes we can heal this nation.

Yes we can repair this world.

Yes we can.

We know the battle ahead will be long, but always remember that no matter what obstacles stand in our way, nothing can stand in the way of the power of millions of voices calling for change.

We have been told we cannot do this by a chorus of cynics...they will only grow louder and more dissonant ........... We've been asked to pause for a reality check. We've been warned against offering the people of this nation false hope.

But in the unlikely story that is America, there has never been anything false about hope.

Now the hopes of the little girl who goes to a crumbling school in Dillon are the same as the dreams of the boy who learns on the streets of LA; we will remember that there is something happening in America; that we are not as divided as our politics suggests; that we are one people; we are one nation; and together, we will begin the next great chapter in the American story with three words that will ring from coast to coast; from sea to shining sea --

Yes. We. Can.

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紐約花痴鄉民版

2007年6月13日《I've Got A Crush on Obama》

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老實說，三個月前的我還不太清楚歐巴馬何許人也，聽過名字，只覺得如果他在日本會很倒楣，因為他會被叫歐巴馬桑，乍聽之下不知道是在叫歐巴桑還是媽媽桑。

但經由以上三支娛樂性質很高的短片後，我對他的興趣與日俱增。我因為小布希而討厭共和黨，也連帶堵爛共和黨的阿諾和禿頭凱吉，所以即便關我屁事也無條件巴望民主黨大勝，設想美國此時來個黑人總統也挺浪漫不是？

本篇寫作的影片發生時序由近而遠，最早的「歐巴馬辣妹軍團」MV彷彿是去年底或今年元月看到的，笑到不慎抽筋，那也是我對歐巴馬產生crush的濫觴。

你能想像周杰倫，蔡依林站出來幫馬小九唱歌助選嗎？好像不行，只有白冰冰和周遊。余天為謝小夫唱首歌（或表演一套魚降拳）呢？我贊成，因為會達到反效果。美國年輕人普遍支持開放的民主黨，台灣的民主進步黨卻做到人人喊打，讓同胞回頭寄情保守的國民黨，我們的寶島，還真寶。