前幾日在晚間新聞得知,未來申請澳洲公民者必須通過公民測驗後,老娘一整個相當之怒!當然這怒絕對不是因為知道自己不可能通過測驗的前提下導致...咳咳...
上網估狗後在news.com.au找到了公民測驗的考題範本之一,雖說只有短短20題選擇題,但是一試之下果然是壯烈被當了~囧~(因驚嚇過度導致虛弱且癱軟倒地的囧~)
虛弱歸虛弱,還是得先把試題給交代一下,不過選項就讓我省略了吧,請閣下隨便做完然後隨便的對一下底下的答案...交代完畢,請容萬念俱灰的奴家回房隨便自盡兩下先~
1. Which colours are represented on the Australian flag?
2. Indigenous people have lived in Australia for ... ?
3. Australia's national flower is the ?
4. Which is a popular sport in Australia?
5. Australia's political system is a ?
6. The Capital of Australia is... ?
7. Which animals are on the Australian Coat of Arms?
8. Where did the first European settlers to Australia come from?
9. Who is Australia's head of state?
10. Who was the first Prime Minister of Australia?
11. What song is Australia's national anthem?
12. What do you call the elected head of a state government?
13. Which federal political party or parties are in power?
14. Which of the following are Australian values?
15. Australia's values are based on the ?
16. What does Anzac Day commemorate?
17. In what year did the first European settlers arrive?
18. How many states are there in Australia?
19. Australian soldiers fought in ?
20. What is Australia's biggest river system?
公佈答案:
警告!下文內含強烈負面情緒,須注重胎教之孕婦與認真魔人敬請選擇性小心服用
1. Blue, red and white 這個有比較簡單.推!
2. At least 40,000 years 靠!我連台灣的原住民歷史都不甚瞭了,難道會跟澳洲原住民比較熟嗎?
3. Wattle 不知道是啥!只是想噓!
4. Cricket 騙肖!怎麼可能不是足球!我家才四個頻道能看,每天打開就有兩個頻道永遠都在踢足球,明明就是不踢不看足球會死的國家啊!
5. Parliamentary democracy 隨便... 自暴自棄中...
6. Canberra
7. Kangaroo and emu 放肆!你們眼中還有無尾熊的存在嗎!
8. England
9. Queen Elizabeth II 怎麼?不是總理啊...噓!
10.Sir Edmund Barton 哪位啊?你貴姓啊先生?你要載我去哪啊!
11. Advance Australia Fair 我只知道GameBoy Advance!
12. Premier 是不是只有我覺得這個字看起來很像某種比薩口味?
13. Liberal Party and National Party 不能用顏色代替嗎?
14. Men and women are equal.A fair go.Mateship 這啥啊?我的Dr.eye查不到這字啊!
15. The Judaeo-Christian tradition 這什麼鬼!
16. The Gallipoli landing 有諾曼第登陸出名嗎!噓!
17. 1788
18. 6 還算簡單,推!
19. World War I and World War I I .Korean War .Vietnam War 切!真的是很愛跟人械鬥吼!
20. The Murray Darling 誰鳥你是哈尼還是達令啊!無法解決東岸水荒的廢河還好意思拿來說嘴!
看上文就能得知老娘已經頂唔順(=受不了.凍未條)到一個為噓而噓的程度,因此下文純屬師奶潑婦罵街加情緒性謾罵...
我個人認為澳洲是抱著輸人不輸陣的心態,硬要學其他國家:例如英國,所以才搞這個公民測驗的,但是人家英國有悠久歷史加上優美文化,光看看大英博物館裡,久遠的有古埃及被詛咒的木乃伊,優美的有圓明園珍稀古玩,
但是澳洲的歷史教科書,好像比較像是被英國流放來坐牢之黑獄日誌,加上屠殺原住民雜記,還有跟在人家屁股後面到處參戰卻沒糖分大事紀啊!
再看看文化好了...那個...哪位能告訴我一下澳洲文化是啥?以白人為主流的澳洲,卻只能偷拿原住民的原創超飽和色彩鮮豔畫作,跟英雄氣短吹死人不償命超長樂器當作自己的文化代表,我實在想不出還有其他能夠代表澳洲白人文化的東西了
說到底這片土地,從一開始就不屬於白人的,我認為澳洲的歷史,就是各國人種在此落地生根的奮鬥史,澳洲的文化,就是各地風俗匯聚的集錦 澳洲本質上根本就是一碗雜碎麵啊!當權者卻硬要搞一個所謂含有澳洲價值的公民測驗,聽起來簡直就比"具有中國特色的社會主義",還要更令人囧到最高點,心中有囧囧!
之前還不知道從哪聽來的,說是移民要考英文才能入籍,姑且不論是否有這回事,但我認為全世界使用英語的國家,最沒資格考人英文的就是澳洲
其實在澳洲才一年多,但我發現有些澳洲人真的很愛發明懶字(相對於廣東話的懶音是導致發音不正咬字不清之症頭,澳客的懶字則是好好一個字被斷尾,尤有甚者則是再來個狗尾續貂裝可愛字尾...)
茲舉例如下(有些是從身邊的朋友同事那聽來的):
Woolworth超市=wooly
Bundaberg rum酒=Bundy 阿是要買連續殺人狂Ted Bundy來喝嗎?
Christopher=Christy = = 你要嘛用Christ代替就好,把自己兒子叫得這麼娘不怕他留下童年陰影?要是他長大後難忍太娘而跑去做催眠回溯,並發現自己這麼娘砲的真正原因,真叫他情何以堪哪...
crocodile=croc 我承認我剛剛去查完整的拼法了 囧TZ
night clothes=nightie underwear=undie...是有沒有需要這麼卯起來裝可愛啊
Australian=Aussie 其實發音有點像廣東話的痾屎...
呼~今天就罵到這先,不過還是難掩比大無限樂團還要大的無限空虛,就像我家麥麥,每次聽到垃圾車來的音樂就狂吠加送同捆吹狗螺,但是該來的還是會來啊!狂吠的唯一功效就是自爽,而副作用則是空虛,所以 to 爽, or not to 爽:that is the question...
附上先進的免費線上模擬測驗












推薦上專欄

不過,這項公民測驗不知道是不是只針對目前還沒提出申請的人,像已經開始做移民監的人,應該不用考吧!如果這些人真的也要考,那可能真的會死很多人!
這個新政策是只影響尚未申請公民測驗的嗎??還是只限於尚未申請永久居留的人?
正好看到這個話題 想說留一下,
上上個禮拜看ABC的論壇,
就是邀請各方移民以及各大學教授等學者討論這個話題,
中間還用超大螢幕連線一個政府部門不知道什麼鬼的女人現場連線(我看她也不敢現身現場吧!),
那個女人就blah一堆, 說什麼五十年前我爹我娘也是這樣從義大利移民來怎樣怎樣拼出來的,
結果一個Griffith Uni的學者就問了一句,
"如果是你爸媽考這個試, 他們有辦法通過嗎?" (((((站起來鼓鼓掌)))))
那女人就ㄓㄨ了一下, 說什麼, 還有很多其他國家也辦這個考試呀, 五十年前環境不一樣呀~ (啊那個考試的內容都是考近代史喔!!) blah一堆. 頓時間感到場內就一堆鄙視的眼光!
身為澳客, 說實話我不反對這個測驗.
但是先決條件是, 澳洲的教育系統必須也包含考試的這些內容!!
要不然哪有說規定人家嫁進來就要背族譜, 自己家裡人連阿祖的名字都不知道的!
請問
我很早就拿到pr了,到2007年10月份過期,所以我2006就開始來澳洲移民監預計2008年1月份累積兩年,請問我需要公民考試嗎?住滿兩年英文很破很徬徨的人跪問
citizenship test....sigh
是丫,channel7的人訪問了一堆Aussie半數以上也答不出,一位高人就說啦,如果連我們都不知道的問題,為何期待外人知道呢。以下是朋友傳來的取笑我們政府的新新問題,不禁讓想起這個在ABC節目 CNNnnn :-)
1. Do you understand the meaning of, but are unable to explain the origin of the term, 'died in the arrse'?
2. What is a "bloody little beauty"?
3. Are these terms related: chuck a sickie; chuck a spaz; chuck a U-ey?
4. Explain the following passage: 'In the arvo last Chrissy the relos rocked up for a barbie, some bevvies and a few snags. After a bit of a Bex and a lie down we opened the pressies, scoffed all the chockies, bickies and lollies. Then we drained a few tinnies and Mum did her block after Dad and Steve had a barney and a bit of biffo.'
5. Macca, Chooka and Wanger are driving to Surfers in their Torana. If they are travelling at 100 km/h while listening to Barnsey, Farnsey and Acca Dacca, how many slabs will each person on average consume between flashing a brown eye and having a slash?
6. Complete the following sentences:
a) 'If the van's rockin' don't bother ?
b) You're going home in the back of a ?
c) Fair crack of the ?
7. I've had a gutful and I can't be fagged. Discuss
8. Have you ever been on the giving or receiving end of a wedgie?
9. Do you have a friend or relative who has a car in their front yard 'up on blocks'? Is his name Bruce and does he have a wife called Cheryl?
10. Does your family regularly eat a dish involving mincemeat, cabbage, curry powder and a packet of chicken noodle soup called either chow mein, chop suey or kai see ming?
11. What are the ingredients in a rissole?
12. Demonstrate the correct procedure for eating a Tim Tam.
13. Do you have an Aunty Irene who smokes 60 cigarettes a day and sounds like a bloke?
14. In any two-hour period have you ever eaten three-bean salad, a chop and two serves of pav washed down with someone else's beer that has been flogged from a bath full of ice?
15. When you go to a bring- your-own-meat barbie can you eat other people's meat or are you only allowed to eat your own?
16. What purple root vegetable beginning with the letter 'b' is required by law to be included in a hamburger with the lot?
17. Do you own or have you ever owned a lawn mower, a pair of thongs, an Esky or Ugg boots?
18. Is it possible to 'prang a car' while doing 'circle work'?
19. Who would you like to crack on to?
20. Who is the most Australian: Kevin 'Bloody' Wilson, John 'True Blue' Williamson, Kylie Minogue or Warnie?
21. Is there someone you are only mates with because they own a trailer or have a pool?
22. What does "sinkin at a mates joint and getten para" mean?
可以向妳當初出生的醫院申請。如果是中文版的要拿去翻譯社翻譯。
記得上次好像是看到你這裡的澳洲公民測驗題目,which is a popular sport in Australia? 我那時候看完後也是答AFL。問了其他葵的朋友還有我工作的同事,通通都答AFL。跟他們講說答錯了,他們才說有可能AFL是在Victoria盛行,可是NSW還有Queensland等都是Rugby的運動。所以如果是說popular sports in Australia的話,Cricket是比較正確的。
然後好像是上禮拜看新聞的時有看到,因為這個新政策有近20%的人沒有通過公民測驗,工黨政府好像有意思要準備一個budget 輔助新移民融入澳洲生活。
我也是沒有給出生證明.我也是給戶籍謄本.
澳洲公民測驗
新新澳洲公民測驗就當成飯後茶餘笑話吧
問了我的 fair dinkum, true blue澳洲朋友這些題目,要不就大笑,要嗎各自有一套答案。
我的Brother-in-law,就說 none of them you lady needs to know. 恩,好吧 you beauty.
同學Shane又說啦,從不同州長大的人也會答出不同答案的。
就像是 6.b) 若是從Vic來的會說 "You're going home in the back of a divvy van" (means a Divisional Van). 但是QLD & NSW 就會說 "You're going home in the back of a paddy wagons (means the lockable Police trucks). 所以唄, 如果在 MCG 醉後大吵 就會進 divvy van, 但是鬧事在SCG就會進paddy wagon。
好友奉勸可千萬別做出22.因為那是指 collapsing/sleeping at a friend's place after getting drunk 歐。
請問是不是去考試時,帶著英文版的 戶藉謄本 以替代 Birth Certificate 就可以了呢?
請教
請問一下喔,哪裡找的到200題題庫呢?英文不好想死記答案在去考試 = =
師奶不用擔心,現在都流行可以委託的,只要請家人拿著妳的身份證明文件及委託書就可以辦了.一般委託書網路上都有版本,戶政也會提供.不過應該不會限定要幾個月的效期吧.希望不會,要不然很麻煩的.
上面還有說若你的公民申請遞件時間是在2007年10月1日前(指已申請公民的人),那你就不用考了..但年紀在18以下及60以上的人.還有一些特殊的情況也不用考.
真的要出生證明,所以除了出生證明及護照還要第二個有照片的證明身份文件,如用駕照.(怎麼那麼像台灣的銀行開戶還要求第二身份文件.)
考試是20題多選選擇題.電腦考試.
還有包含三個強制回答的問題.如澳洲公民的義務與權利.
http://www.citizenship.gov.au/test/works/how-works.htm
60分才算通過.包含那三個強制回答的問題.